Victor in Viktor vs. Viktor

Ukrainians went to the polls in November to cast their ballots in a presidential run-off between would-be reformer Viktor Yushchenko (a favorite in western Europe) and current prime minister Viktor Yanukovich (a favorite in Moscow). At stake: the future of the biggest nation between the EU and Russia. According to the official tally, Prime Minister Yanukovich has won. BUT WAIT...THERES MORE!!! But many Ukrainians, and some international election observers, are now claiming the run-off was rigged.

You might be asking your self...How was it rigged? Well now that's an excellent question, Yushchenko was poisoned 2 months previous, boy does that suck for him. Fortunately ALL was righted when they revoted in December and Yushchenko arose victor.

Random acts of poisoning? Bad bad bad form...Everyone knows if you want to rig something you don't 'accidentally' poison your opponent before the election. That just screams guilty. Granted they (whoever poisoned Viktor) were discrete about it, but their plots were foiled. I mean when was the last time you heard about a REALLY good poisoning? My vote goes to Rasputin. I mean you wanna talk about a good poisoning, Rasputin got it pretty badly. He suffered through poison, a few gun shots and a few beatings.


Comming back to reality, there are much worse ways to die. I mean I don't know that I'd much enjoy the whole skinning trend in modern executions. Also, I bet you'd be hard pressed to find someone who has the testicular fortitude to request that their head be sawed off, like a common branch, instead off placed in a guillotine.

So the next time you get food poisoning, quit yer bitchin'...it could be worse