Cancerchu...I choose you!!!

So some really smart dudes got together for a dudes night out. They all put on these SMOKIN hot white coats, slacks and nice dress shoes (except the guy who put on penny loafers, he was sent home to think about what he had done). Before they could start their fun...they had one last obligatory action, getting a cooler full of cold ones. The dudes then went to town. They decided they would go straight to the 'lab'.

While there all the cold blood that was in their cooler was examined. Eventually they discovered a new oncogene in cancer strains. The gene happens to be necessary for cancer to turn normal cells into, well, cancerous ones. So what, you might ask, is this little gene called? Well it technically is POK Erythroid Myeloid Ontogenic factor (Which I'm sure means a lot to you). Its nickname, or what I think is its pronounceable name, is the Pokemon Gene. I bet you can figure out how it got that name.

Real? Yes. Coincidence? Perhaps. Ironic? Nope. I believe this is gods way of telling us something. That cute little yellow guy is bad for you and will kill you. Yes, if we (as a race) keep watching Pikachu and Squirtle, they will eventually into our blood stream and attack all of our awesomely healthy cells. They will probably start by trying to lightning those cells. I must hand it to pikachu, I mean lightning is a pretty cool ability to have. Although Pikachu does have a cool little trick to kill of our cells, he totally ripped the idea off.

Right now, if I were Raiden, I'd be pretty pissed off. If I saw some little yellow shit try to take the ability I coined and claim it for himself, please believe their would be some hell to pay. I would evince him that if he doesn't cut the crap and lose the whole lightning thing, that there will be a seriatim of painful acts commin his way.

Actually, that sounds kinda fun...I wouldn't mind kicking a little yellow guy right now...think about how far he would fly. The Cheat would be perfect for this. Kicking the cheat would definitely slake my thirst for kicking a little yellow guy. But ya know, there is already someone to do that, so I guess I'll have to just find something else to do. Crap.