Driver Carries No Cash...He's Married

Gearing up for Valentine's Day? Don't let it make you sick. A weekend report in The Psychologist magazine argues that mental health professionals should treat "love sickness" as a real, and potentially serious, psychological disorder. Its symptoms include mania, depression, and obsessive-compulsive behavior.

Love is a many splendored thing. It can also be downright creepy. Pretty much its just weird...but what is the reason for love? Copulation is my guess. That 5-20 seconds (yeah 20 if you're Peter North)of bliss is enough to drive most guys to love.

But not all creatures believe in love just for sex. Lets check out some of these wacky animals.

Lesbienism: For the whiptail lizard, there's a good reason why a good man is hard to find: there aren't any. All of their eggs are genetic duplicates, clones of the female. The lady lizards still have some romance, though. Two females will court to induce egg laying, taking turns playing "the male." What a cool animal. But then again, probably one of the most difficult species to deal with. On one hand...ya got two chicks doin each other, AWESOME. But then there are SOOO many women around that are just achin to complain about something.

Prostitution: Love isn't in the air in an Adelie penguin colony; it's on the ground. That's because Adelie penguins build stone platforms during courtship to protect their eggs. But some penguin females have a different strategy: they're hookers. After settling down with a mate, these females will approach other males and trade sex for stones. Sometimes the female even leaves with her stone before the male gets to hit that majestic moment. Either way, she picks up a stone from the male's nest and moves it back to her mate's. What a great idea, legalized prostitution for the protection of your youth. Clearly these penguins are not from California, otherwise they'd be hauled off to jail and had their sexual fun there via a 250 lb black guy named Tiny.

S&M:After weeks of searching, a male mantis finally gets lucky. Yet just when the magic moment occurs, his lover reaches around and rips his head off for a snack. Yeah we've all heard about this little practice. The dumb broad kills the dude because she needs nourishment for her young. Not going to far into this one, except the fact that I'm glad I'm not having sex with any mantis'

Oral Sex:Living in the pitch black of the ocean deep, anglerfish don't have much use for good looks. And because finding a mate is so difficult in the abyss, mating pairs bond for life, literally. The male, only a fraction of the size of the female, hooks onto her belly with his teeth and never lets go. His body joins with hers, slowly losing internal organs until he becomes little more than a sperm-producing parasite that she carries around for life. If I had to be stuck swimmin around with a female for the rest of my life, I would probably just bitch and moan about it because there would be nothing I could do, although, come to think of, I probably couldn't even bitch and moan seeing as my mouth is attached to her fat stomach.
Fuck!